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By Christin Farmer Kane
I have been in search of a millionaire mentor for at least 3 years now. I had outgrown the nonprofit industry and relished the thought of being a successful entrepreneur. I knew it would be 10 times harder than being an employee but freedom — both physical and financial, are of the utmost importance to me.
To that end, I reached out to a guy I knew to be wealthy — he was a generous donor to the organization I had founded. My desire to become rich, and an influential philanthropist made the thought of him becoming my mentor attractive.
He responded almost immediately, said yes to my mentoring request, and agreed to meet with me. I was quite inspired by his story. I left the meeting knowing what I wanted to do, and how I needed to get it done.
Here’s what I learned:
Be super persistent.
Not kind of persistent, but super persistent. No matter what the circumstances are currently, live and talk like you are already who you say you want to become. Even when you think the door has been closed, it is up to you to beat on it until you knock it down. The world truly is your oyster. Your access to it solely depends on you. There is nothing in between you and what you want, except you. Refuse to give up.
Talk to people face to face.
This was a big one for me. I try to avoid people at all costs, and prefer a text/email, although I don’t like those channels either. In all, I’m a hermit. I prefer to be left alone, but that will absolutely not suffice in business. When you want something done and it involves a partnership or a business in general, you need to talk face to face. Call a meeting. Even if it’s just 15 minutes. Nothing can replace human interaction. We are literally designed to connect with one another.
Make mistakes, but don’t be careless.
Vito Corleone once said, “Women and children can be careless, but not men.” Point taken, but that was in a time before now. Today, none of us can afford to be careless. It is, however, ok to make mistakes, and in fact, according to him, you most certainly will. In his words, “some days are going to be great, like really good, business is great; then other days, you’ll feel like balling up in a corner to cry — and no one will give a shit.”
Take on risks — smart risks, big risks, but take them.
Fear must be irrelevant. It only exists so you don’t do something stupid, like trying to stop a gunfight. It’s not there to stop you from pursuing what you desire to have in life. When you allow fear to overtake you, you will become resentful of your life’s circumstances; tortured by the thought of “what if.”
Never let people know where you are.
You may not have a dollar to your name, but never let people know that. Walk in the assumption that you have what you want already, and people will believe you’re there. You’ll start to believe you’re there and that belief will turn into reality quickly. Go with the flow, and make decisions that say, “I have what I desire.” You will begin to show your future reality in the way you walk and talk.
Go where the market is.
It’s great to help people, but the real way to help people is by demonstration and having the money to help in the way you’d like to. In the words of the late Bob Proctor, a poor person has never given anyone a job. If you want to be rich, you have to go where the money is, where there is a market. Whatever people are buying is the business you need to get into, but have a niche. Do something that sets you apart and can feed consumers’ needs or solve their problems.
The world owes you nothing.
If you believe it does, you will always be looking for someone to come and save you, robbing you of the valuable life lessons that make you the powerful being you are. Belief in yourself is your greatest asset. Devoid of any social labels — race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, etc., who are you? Asking yourself that question should lead you back to, “I’m a unique and divine, powerful ass human being,” period. Armed with that knowledge, now you can go out and do anything you wish to do.
Wives are the real MVPs.
Wives can speak to a husband in a way no woman can, not even his mother. She has the power to mirror back to her man exactly what he needs to hear for him to see himself for who and what he truly is. If he doesn’t like it, he has the power to change. How he believes she sees him is oftentimes more important than how he sees himself. He doesn’t want to let either one of them down. A part of a man’s drive is his ability to provide for himself and the people he loves — his wife and children. That’s understandable.
Ears Wide Open.
A lot of these points may sound familiar but let me point out the correlation to metaphysics — Universal Laws such as the law of attraction, the law of assumption, the law of demonstration, the law of gender, etc. There are so many. If you talk to wealthy people or listen to them, on say, Lewis Howes’ podcast, you’ll hear them all saying the same thing in different ways, which is very helpful. People need to hear things in ways in which they can relate and therefore understand.
This meeting affirmed much of what I knew about how to show up in this world, being a walking embodiment of confidence and certainty, no matter your past or bad experiences that hurt. All that matters is what you believe your new reality will look like. Focus on that, and that you will become.